Life in Summary

Nice...5 months of silence. How can that happen? It’s not that nothing has been happening in my life or the world at large - far from it. Here are some items in summary, in no particular order:

• My second trip to Eastern Europe: youth camp in the mountains of Transylvania; travels in Maramures (northern Romania) in a hired VW Polo; encounters with local people
• A long-distance relationship with an amazing girl in New Jersey. I thought long-distance relationships were well nigh impossible but it is such an adventure. The advent of Skype was a genius idea!
• A loooong summer walk through Budapest, enjoying the architecture, the Jewish district, old book shops, parks and the River Danube.
• A short stay in Bremen, Germany
• Barack Obama was elected as President of the United States
• Seeing 2 American robins in my neighbour's garden. The last time American robins were spotted in the UK was in the 1960s!!
• Hungarian speeches at a wedding in Aberdeen
• A week long hiking trip at Cape Wrath, northwest Scotland
• Credit crunchiness
• Another rainy UK summer

Toyohiko Kagawa

Don’t hide
don’t run
but rather
discover in the midst of fragmentation
a new way forward:
a new kind of journey
marked by its fragility,
uncertainty
and lack of definition
And on that path
to hold those hands
that even in their brokenness
create a new tomorrow.
To dance at the margins
and to see the face of Christ
where hurt is real and pain a way of life.
To be touched
in the eye of the storm,
aware that tomorrow may not bring peace.
Impossible you say:
Let me retreat
and find rest.
What rest my friend
in these fragmented times?

Unless you lead me Lord,
the road I journey is all too hard.
Through trust in Thee alone
can I go on.

Internal Wanderings & Abundant Grace

Something that has struck me again about the character of God is His endless capacity to forgive and to share grace with sinners. The last few months I have felt so spiritually parched and barren, wandering aimlessly, and lazily, in my heart, from Him. Yet, for no merit in myself, He again offers forgiveness and abundant life in Jesus. That’s how I want to live my life – soaring like an eagle on the updrafts of God’s grace and the freedom which He offers, not bound and shackled by own limitations and weaknesses. Yet, I know that when I do stumble and fall He is there to pick me up and accept me and give me the strength to continue, in my faltering way, to follow Him.

Feeling avuncular

I gotta tell you, I'm enjoying being an uncle so much I can't imagine what it must be like to be a father!! My brother's wife had a baby girl at the end of February and Ella is such an amazing baby! I'm still filled with awe every time I see her and the bundle of life she is.

Genesis 3 in the Garden

My garden has been crying out for me to tend to it for too long now. This evening I ventured into it to cut the grass and “do some weeding”. I was confronted with a taste of the curse of Genesis 3:17 when God cursed the ground because of Adam and the ground produced thorns and thistles as a result.

My forearms are testifying to the thorns and thistles and I was confronted with the truth of God’s Word. It reminded me, not only, of my neglect of things horticultural but my neglect of things spiritual at times - many times. How easy it is to grow cold, lazy and negligent in my love for God and His Word.

I couldn’t believe how much effort the garden required just to look tended to again and it still requires more work! So does my walk with God and how I need the help of the Holy Spirit to walk humbly and steadfastly with Him. As I examine my life, it is full of the thorns and thistles of pride, laziness, anger...the list goes on and reflects somewhat the mess and chaos of the wider world. Right there in the garden of my own heart.

Adam wouldn’t have then known the full implications of his and Eve’s actions but even there, in the 3rd chapter of Genesis, God gave them a promise of redemption. I love how Jesus is prophesied right there in verse 15 when God was cursing the evil one for tempting Adam and Eve. Jesus would, one day, conquer him. Sin won’t reign in this world indefinitely without being checked, without being challenged, without being vanquished! And, that’s why Jesus came, to deal with these spiritual and physical weeds, thistles and thorns. I’m looking forward to the new heavens and new earth, in which righteousness will dwell forever.

Wimbledon Quote of the Day IV

The game is postponed because he hit an old lady in the face!

Wimbledon Quote of the Day III

Murray sent an email there, "I'm gonna drop-shot" - Nadal read it!

Wimbledon Quote of the Day II

I like that he plays without a hat.

Wimbledon Quote of the Day

Look how stretchy that tape is!

Jimmy the Jimny

I crashed my car at the beginning of the month. It all happened so quickly: a combination of a wet road, a very sharp corner and rear wheel drive transmission. Before I knew it, I was skidding across the road, then hitting 2 walls before the car came to rest.

Thankfully, there were no passengers or other road users involved and I am thankful to God for safety. Accidents don't always turn out like this and I was mindful of my cousin Rob who had a bad motorcycle accident a couple weeks before me. He was in critical condition for several days before being allowed home and is still being nursed back to full strength by his family.

My Jimny was written off. It looks like superficial damage in the photo but there was so much of it the insurers figured it would be better to write the car off.

Do you want to do life?

That was the question that Karl, my pastor, was asking tonight. We had a mind-blowing baptismal service tonight! The presence of God was so tangible in the testimonies of the 6 who were baptised. Each had a different story of the work of God in their lives but attested to the grace of God in changing them and giving them real life with Him. The presence of God was also evident in the joyful praise and preaching, from John 3:16. Sometimes we get a taste of heaven on earth and what an amazing glimour of the hope that is in Jesus Christ!! God is so good...

All present?

My small group at church started a new series on Wednesday night. It’s called NOOMA and is led by a guy called Rob Bell. The name NOOMA is an English phonetic spelling of the Greek word pneuma, which is commonly translated to “spirit” or “breath”. (see http://nooma.com/)

Here’s a little taster of one of the NOOMA studies:

Many of us have experienced situations where we’ve prayed and it felt like God wasn’t listening. And yet other times we’ve prayed or known someone that prayed and the situation changed. Does God answer prayer? Sometimes, but not all the time? Or does God always answer prayer and it's just that sometimes God says no? Some of us are angry with God for not answering the prayers we’ve prayed for years. Why did he answer their prayer but not ours? What if there’s more to prayer than just God listening and answering? Maybe if we understood how Jesus prayed, our concepts and expectations of prayer would change.

Incidentally, that’s not the one my small group watched. We will soon, I hope. The film we viewed this week, entitled Today, was dealing with not living in the past or always thinking about the future, but living to the full - now, today. It was a challenge as a group to discuss what our favourite / most fulfilling time of life was and why it was. Did we hark back to a better day or time, wishing things were somehow different today? Did we think we had been dealt a bad hand? Had life given us a bum deal? Were we carrying baggage that we needed to put down? Or, were we realising what Jesus has for us in his fullness and power today? Were we living selfishly for ourselves or living with open hands, engaging with others and serving them.

Bell spoke of John 20:17 where Jesus says to Mary Magdalene, Do not hold on to me, for I have not yet returned to the Father. Go instead to my brothers and tell them, ‘I am returning to the Father, to my God and your God’. The context was after Jesus’ death and resurrection and Mary Magdalene was looking for Jesus’ body at the tomb where his body had lain. Jesus appeared to Mary and said these words to her: Do not hold on to me. Bell took this to mean that Mary wasn’t to wish that Jesus was still alive in his pre-crucifixion life, that things had somehow turned out differently, that Jesus would remain on the earth, that...Jesus had something far more amazing and profound for Mary, the disciples and his followers for all time. The Holy Spirit was being sent to comfort and indwell his people, to empower and minister the power of Jesus in this world through the lives of Christians.

That stimulated and gripped me. Although I don’t necessarily think back to a specific time that seemed better in my life, I am not always living in the light of the presence of the Holy Spirit in my life. I am not always present for those in my life. It is so easy to be full of the stresses of life or occupied with other thoughts when people need our full attention and relationship.

I was driving to Glasgow last week and was caught in a mega traffic jam on the M8. As I was starting to allow myself to get frustrated, wishing I could sail straight through and not have to negotiate the mayhem, I was reminded of the NOOMA study. I could pointlessly wish I was somewhere else or accept the circumstance and think on good things as Philippians 4:8 challenges us. This wasn’t just the power of positive thinking but actually moving beyond the circumstances and seeing and experiencing what God has for us at that time, now. What does God have for us to learn? How can we more closely relate to him and to others around us?

This morning at church another circumstance painfully brought this lesson home to me. A guy, Mike, who I had been getting to know at church over recent months died this morning. Last Sunday I sat next to him during the morning service and he requested prayer for going into hospital during the week for heart issues. I said I would pray for him. I had every intention of doing it and I like to think I said a silent prayer for him last Sunday. I don’t remember. But I didn’t diligently pray for him when he was at the hospital. Now, I’m not saying that Mike would still be alive today had I prayed for him like I wanted to. God is a sovereign God. What I am saying is that I allowed the busy-ness and circumstances of last week to cloud my vision and distract me from being present and praying for Mike.

Relationship is about getting near to someone and being there for them. Often, I am not good at relationship. OK, maybe on a superficial level, but I take a long time to really open up and get real with people and allow them to get real with me. That is possibly why I am not (yet) married. Again, God is sovereign and has his will and purposes and, yes, I am glad that I am not yet married but I have failed in relationships so far. I have been selfish and unintentionally hurtful to those who I have got somewhat close to.

I am so thankful for the grace of a wondrously tender and generous Father God. We make mistakes, we sin, we foul up again and again and again. We hurt, we forget, we fail, and yet, God is there and loves us despite...He is there for us and wants us to learn from our weakness, from these circumstances that come our way. Oh, how I want to learn from these things and be here, today, for the people I know and love...

The Hope of Spring

A vivid yellow splash of colour under a graffiti-sprayed flyover caught my eyes recently as I was driving to Glasgow. I was driving to an Easter Sunday morning service in Glasgow thinking of the mess and chaos of the world within and without when I noticed the daffodils. There they were, sheltered under the bridge, amongst the traffic, the rubbish, the bottles and the art-work painted on the uprights.

Those daffodils were a timely reminder to me of what it means to be a Christian. We are here in this world, living on a fallen planet, surrounded by chaos and beauty and sin and suffering and righteousness.

Those daffodils made me think of that first resurrection Sunday. Scriptures speak of the need for Jesus to leave heaven, to be born on this earth and to live a perfect life, amidst the pain, the suffering, rejection, ridicule. He was a good man, a good teacher, a prophet, yes, but he was so much more. He was God in the flesh, showing a fallen and degraded mankind the way back to a relationship with a perfect and justly holy God. Jesus was willing to condescend so much that he became one of us - a man who would hunger, hurt, weep and suffer. A man who would heal, comfort, restore and laugh. A man who was willing to get his hands dirty in the mess and humanity of the world. A man who was put to death on a cross. Jesus, although Scriptures tell us he had no beauty that we should esteem him, was beautiful in how he lived that perfect life and how he spoke of the way back to God. He was like those daffodils surrounded by ugliness.

Three days after lying in the grave, Jesus rose from the dead, with the Father's approval that he had paid the penalty for sin, our sin. He had no sin of his own - he did not deserve to die or to suffer in any way and, yet, he chose to suffer in the worst way imaginable. Jesus gladly chose to receive our sin transferred to his unblemished account. And, what did we receive in return? His perfect, spotless righteousness. Righteousness acceptable to God transferred to our overdrawn and bankrupt account.

That is the hope of Easter, that is the power of the resurrection bursting into the darkness of this world! That is our only hope.

A Ben Ledi Buffeting

I almost bailed out of our planned hillwalk for Saturday. The weather forecast was predicting 65 mile per hour winds and heavy rain in the Scottish mountains. Two friends and I discussed the foulness of the forecast and our potential folly on Friday, one deciding to boycott the proceedings. Chris and I agreed to drive up north of Callander on Saturday morning and then reassess the conditions for tackling Ben Ledi. Ben Ledi, at 2883 feet, is just 117 feet shy of a Munro and I had not climbed it before.

Looking out the window on Saturday morning, I was still inwardly doubting our sanity and the drive north from Edinburgh was gusty, to say the least. We went in Chris’ car. Chris’ new Corolla experienced several strong windy side-swipes as we passed exposed areas of open land and one sudden torrential downpour where we the car was slowed to a crawl. Thankfully, everyone else on the motorway did the same as the visibility was minimal.

By the time we arrived at Callander, the inclement weather had mostly lifted and we decided to give it a go, with the escape clauses that we would get off the mountain if it became dangerous. Our backup plan of doing a distillery tour or sitting in a pub or cafe, waiting for the Calcutta Cup rugby match, still sounded appealing at this point. However, we weren’t to be disappointed. We were encouraged to see other walkers setting off from the car park near the Falls of Leny, so we set off in the assurance that we were not alone in our madness.

The steep walk from the carpark was rewarded with a short wooded stretch of path with rich, warm aromas of spruce and larch and the cascading sounds of rushing water. We soon left the woods for a steep, rocky path up the east side of Ben Ledi, curving south for a while beneath a steep ridge before the wind appeared. Until that point we had been nicely sheltered by the ridge, but when the path turned north-west towards the summit, Chris and I were met with what the forecast accurately described as 65 mile per hour winds in the mountains.

I had never experienced walking in such powerful winds and we were forcibly propelled from left to right as we slowly made our way up the muddy path. Chris was walking ahead of me and, at times, looked to be leaning into the wind at a 45° angle. At times it felt like G-forces were being unleashed on us as I felt my face contort to previously unimaginable shapes in the onslaught. There was no danger, thankfully, of us being blown to our deaths off precipitous cliffs, so we persevered towards the top. The only danger would have been a loss of pride at falling over without warning due to a sudden drop in the wind.

We were greeted with the sight of at least 2 deer running over the slopes very near the summit. It was the first time I had seen deer so high up a mountain and I laughed to think of them blowing up into the air by the gusts, legs flailing ungracefully. The deer were gone when we reached the summit but the views from the top were stunning. Looking west we saw Loch Katrine glistening in the sunlight and to the south-east we enjoyed vistas of and beyond Callander. The windfarm to the east was getting a good workout and it was mesmerising to watch the rotating blades in the distance.

We lingered near the top for a short time for lunch, finding shelter from the wind. One of the walkers we met in the carpark joined us and, as our bodies began to cool, Chris and I decided to make the descent back to the car and to the rugby awaiting us in a warm Callander pub.

The descent was much less windy than our ascent. We enjoyed a run down a steep, snowy bank and as the rain and hail began to lash, quickened our pace back to some dry clothes and a welcoming pint. With wind-burnt faces and tired legs, we capped off an invigorating day by witnessing Scotland beat England to lift the Calcutta Cup. Even the wind at Murrayfield wasn’t enough to dampen the spirits of many thousand exuberant Scots.

Giant killers...almost

I like underdogs, the small, less experienced teams who live the dream for a while and, at times, against all expectation and logic, upset and beat the more powerful team. It was thrilling to see part-timers Havant and Waterlooville get to the 4th round of the FA Cup and make Liverpool work for their money today. The H&V team are made up of a group of hard-working guys who are cabbies, bin-men, physios in their day jobs. They didn't beat the multi-million pound Liverpool men today but at 5-2, playing at Anfield, and twice going ahead, they did themselves proud. C'mon the underdogs...

Perkification

I think I’ve turned into a coffee snob. Sometime over the past year, I don’t quite remember when, I stopped drinking instant coffee. No, now the choice is either perked or filtered in the morning, with tea and water my drinks of choice in the office. No instant coffee for me, thank you very much.

I don’t know why this happened, apart from the vast difference in taste and pleasure received from a freshly brewed cup of coffee rather than downing a mug of the dried stuff. Perhaps it was the multiplication of cafes on almost every street corner or the intense aroma inhaled when in perkification. Maybe it’s the extra effort (albeit small) required to make it. I don’t know...but I love it!!!

There is a new non-chain cafe in Edinburgh slightly off the beaten track, which awakened my taste buds for the black medicine recently. If you’re ever walking down Broughton Street, check out Artisan Roast (you can click here even if you're not walking down Broughton Street - http://www.artisanroast.co.uk/). I’m not on commission there, in case you are wondering! Even if you’re not a coffee snob like me, it is still worth a visit for the rich aroma, the amazing, antique-looking huge grinder and the hot chocolate. And their slogan is For Beans That Dance - how cool is that?!

I know, it can be expensive but I think it is a small price to pay for one of life’s simple pleasures.

The Unseen

Why is it that, so often in life, we have a siege mentality - that when life gets messy and tough and uncomfortable we shrink back, start to fear and doubt and feel that we deserve better? That, somehow, we don't deserve things to turn out the way they do?

I was challenged reading II Corinthians 4 : 16 - 18 today:

...We do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen but what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

Our focus in life determines how we live our lives. Are we, am I, focused on eternity, or on the here and now, the immediate? Am I bound and shackled by circumstances, captivated by events, however haphazard and tumultuous they seem to be? Or do I experience life to the full, with all its changes and surprises, and, yes, grieve and weep and sorrow at times, but not as those with no hope.

God is in the business of renewal. He is making all things new and His plans and purposes are eternal and unchanging and pure and life-giving. And He wants us to take these experiences to Him and to view them in the light of eternity and His victory through the person of Jesus. That doesn't mean we will, necessarily, understand the circumstances. Often, we won't. But, He will give the strength and peace that surpasses understanding and a purpose to live for Him in this messy world, giving hope and light to others, while trusting a God who is good and sovereign...all the time.

Oh, how I want that to be true of me...

Life Means So Much - Chris Rice

Chris Rice sings it so much better with his song "Life Means So Much"

Every day is a journal page
Every man holds a quill and ink
And there's plenty of room for writing in
All we do is believe and think
So will you compose a curse
Or will today bring the blessing
Fill the page with rhyming verse
Or some random sketching

Teach us to count the days
Teach us to make the days count
Lead us in better ways
That somehow our souls forgot
Life means so much
Life means so much
Life means so much

Every day is a bank account
And time is our currency
So nobody's rich, nobody's poor
We get 24 hours each
So how are you gonna spend
Will you invest, or squander
Try to get ahead
Or help someone who's under

Teach us to count the days
Teach us to make the days count
Lead us in better ways
That somehow our souls forgot
Life means so much
Life means so much
Life means so much

Has anybody ever lived who knew the value of a life
And don't you think giving is all
What proves the worth of yours and mine

Teach us to count the days
Teach us to make the days count
Lead us in better ways
That somehow our souls forgot
Life means so much

Every day is a gift you've been given
Make the most of the time every minute you're living

Check out http://www.chrisrice.com/ and http://www.rocketownrecords.com/

What is your life?

Life is so transitory. It doesn’t always feel like it. At times we feel that we are invincible and the eternal hardly crosses our minds. Day to day passes and the here and now seems so pressing, so immediate, so important.

Death can change that perspective, especially when it is close loved ones who depart this life. A grandmother and an aunt recently both suddenly passed away, unexpectedly. I say unexpectedly because, despite old age and illness, death still comes without warning. I lived 2000 miles away from these relatives but despite the distance there are still plenty of precious memories. Both my grandmother and aunt had strong, real faith in Jesus. Both set godly examples of what it means to be a Christian, trusting him through the journey of life, in the good times and the bad times. My grandmother lived a life of prayer for her family spread out over the USA and farther afield around the world. My aunt had pressing physical difficulties throughout her whole life and yet she exhibited a simple, childlike trust in Jesus that was an example of what Jesus said a Christian should be.

In my recent travels to these 2 funerals and a cousin’s joyous wedding, I was struck by the changing nature of the clouds I was viewing from numerous airplane windows. I was reminded that as James said, our lives are like those clouds, appearing for a little time and then vanishing away. What kind of legacy will I leave? Will it be one that leaves a lasting imprint of Jesus and eternity on the lives of others? Will it be one that appears like a vapour and quickly disappears, leaving no impact on others? Will it be a life that, like those clouds, though swirling and disappearing in an instant, gripped and moved me? That, like my grandmother and aunt would have prayed for and lived out in their lives for all to see, giving glory to Jesus, who is the same yesterday, today and forever?