I have started blogging again after a long break!! With all the recent changes in my life - quitting my job, selling my flat, moving to the US, studying Counselling, getting engaged, etc etc - it is time for a fresh start.
The new site is From Here on Out - check it out! No idea how often I will blog but I hope to update it as often as I can.
Saturday, 2 January 2010
Thursday, 26 February 2009
Natural Born Believers
I saw a New Scientist article this week that caught my attention. It was the line It seems that our minds are finely tuned to believe in gods that caught my attention.
Hold that thought - more soon!!
Hold that thought - more soon!!
Saturday, 24 January 2009
Ruffling feathers
It's great to see Andy Murray already playing tennis so well this season and, particularly, at the Australian Open. I love hearing the top 3 seeds whingeing about the new kid on the block (see Jonathan Overend blog) - here's hoping Murray can keep the momentum going...
Friday, 23 January 2009
The Church of Obama - Post Script
In my last post (The Church of Obama) I wanted to blog on Inauguration Day but it was very late and I was exhausted. Perhaps I sounded somewhat negative or harsh on Obama. That was not my plan. My eyes filled with tears at the significance of the day, especially watching the heartfelt and huge smile on Obama's face as he was sworn in to office. I love a country where such a thing is possible today - where anyone, no matter their race or colour can be elected to office.
My main purpose for the blog was to comment on the fact that one man will not solve humanity's deepest needs, although I do hope and pray that, for the terms he has while in office, President Obama will help make the world a better place.
My main purpose for the blog was to comment on the fact that one man will not solve humanity's deepest needs, although I do hope and pray that, for the terms he has while in office, President Obama will help make the world a better place.
Tuesday, 20 January 2009
The Church of Obama
Inauguration Day 2009
How many superlatives have been used over the course of today as Barack Obama took office as the 44th President of the United States of America: transformation, change, remaking America, hope, future... to name but a few. One newscaster on Radio 5 described the thronging crowds in Washington DC as worshipping at the church of Obama. It's hard not to get swept along by the excitement and euphoria.
It was exciting; it was momentous to watch as the first African American was sworn in to office. I am excited and happy to have experienced this day, although over 2000 miles away.
But, Obama is only a man. The real job of leading starts now and I hope and pray that Obama will be a wise and discerning President. In a sense, Obama has set himself up to fail, because hope can mean so many things to so many different people, without actually being defined. I hope that Obama does make a good President, both for the United States and for the wider world.
But, Obama is only a man. He may be a good man; he may be an exceptional and wise, intelligent man, far exceeding his peers. But, he is still a man. Some of today's zeal - and some during the election campaign - was almost messianic in its fervour. Please don't take me wrongly. History has been made. When Obama was born, some parts of the United States were still experiencing segregation.
But, Obama's message of hope is not infallible hope. It is not unshakable hope. The only place that absolute hope can be found is in another man, the Man Christ Jesus, who also came on a wave of hope to the world. Not political hope but spiritual hope. Not temporary hope but lasting hope. Hope that is assured and promised to those who put their faith in and cling to Jesus, because of his death and resurrection. We live in a world which is falling apart, which is transitory and fleeting. The stock exchange was reported today as being the worst ever on Inauguration Day. We get little glimpses of hope in this life of brave leadership.
But, I'm talking about One greater than that, who is not only man but who is also God in the flesh. God with us. That is real Hope and one where I am willing to put my faith.
How many superlatives have been used over the course of today as Barack Obama took office as the 44th President of the United States of America: transformation, change, remaking America, hope, future... to name but a few. One newscaster on Radio 5 described the thronging crowds in Washington DC as worshipping at the church of Obama. It's hard not to get swept along by the excitement and euphoria.
It was exciting; it was momentous to watch as the first African American was sworn in to office. I am excited and happy to have experienced this day, although over 2000 miles away.
But, Obama is only a man. The real job of leading starts now and I hope and pray that Obama will be a wise and discerning President. In a sense, Obama has set himself up to fail, because hope can mean so many things to so many different people, without actually being defined. I hope that Obama does make a good President, both for the United States and for the wider world.
But, Obama is only a man. He may be a good man; he may be an exceptional and wise, intelligent man, far exceeding his peers. But, he is still a man. Some of today's zeal - and some during the election campaign - was almost messianic in its fervour. Please don't take me wrongly. History has been made. When Obama was born, some parts of the United States were still experiencing segregation.
But, Obama's message of hope is not infallible hope. It is not unshakable hope. The only place that absolute hope can be found is in another man, the Man Christ Jesus, who also came on a wave of hope to the world. Not political hope but spiritual hope. Not temporary hope but lasting hope. Hope that is assured and promised to those who put their faith in and cling to Jesus, because of his death and resurrection. We live in a world which is falling apart, which is transitory and fleeting. The stock exchange was reported today as being the worst ever on Inauguration Day. We get little glimpses of hope in this life of brave leadership.
But, I'm talking about One greater than that, who is not only man but who is also God in the flesh. God with us. That is real Hope and one where I am willing to put my faith.
Saturday, 17 January 2009
'09 - Oh, yeah!!
Thanks to Learning from Sophie for the challenge of having a structured blog. I hope to do that this year and, certainly, to be more regular with my blogs in 09 than I was in 08. Here are some ideas for themes:
At the turn of the year I made some of my usual resolutions to be more disciplined in 2009, to exercise more, to eat less, and so on - but I have been doing more thinking these last few weeks about what it means to me to make and break resolutions over and over. Check out Rob Waller's challenging article, from Jan 1st, on resolutions and his thoughts on transformation - Romans 12:2 style. It's a useful exercise to make resolutions but how often does it become another performance treadmill for us? There is a thought provoking sermon at the MBC web-site (Growing in Faith, from Jan 4th). How often do resolutions, taken in the wrong attitude, make us step outside the realm of God's abundant grace? I am going to endeavour to keep my resolutions this year but, more than that, I want my mind to be transformed by the Holy Spirit and, from that, my behaviour to be changed into something beautiful and more like the pattern of Jesus.
- Travel blog of destinations from last year's trips: Transylvania, Maramures, Budapest, Bremen
- Book reviews:The Kite Runner, The Shack, The Gift, I am Legend and any more I may well have forgotten about
- Jesus' authority in a world without it
- Sport comments
- Choices
- Coffee...and cafe musings and ratings
- Biblical character sketches - not majorly theological but things that have excited and stretched me as I have thought about them
- Random thoughts
At the turn of the year I made some of my usual resolutions to be more disciplined in 2009, to exercise more, to eat less, and so on - but I have been doing more thinking these last few weeks about what it means to me to make and break resolutions over and over. Check out Rob Waller's challenging article, from Jan 1st, on resolutions and his thoughts on transformation - Romans 12:2 style. It's a useful exercise to make resolutions but how often does it become another performance treadmill for us? There is a thought provoking sermon at the MBC web-site (Growing in Faith, from Jan 4th). How often do resolutions, taken in the wrong attitude, make us step outside the realm of God's abundant grace? I am going to endeavour to keep my resolutions this year but, more than that, I want my mind to be transformed by the Holy Spirit and, from that, my behaviour to be changed into something beautiful and more like the pattern of Jesus.
Thursday, 15 January 2009
Waking Up
What is the strangest thing that has woken you up? I woke up this morning laughing - out loud - at something in a dream!! It has tickled me all day thinking about it. I wish I could remember what the dream was, but it was certainly funny enough to wake me up!
Thursday, 1 January 2009
Hopes and Fears
I love view points. You know the kind, when you’re on a windy road and you can look back and see where you have come from, and look forward to where you are headed? To me, New Year is like that. It’s a turning point of sorts, a fresh start, a new page and chapter. A place to take stock, think back and dream ahead. Three little words that have stuck with me like glue over this Christmas season have been hopes and fears.
We all have them. This past year has been full of them. We have seen and experienced the credit crunch, heard Barack Obama speaking of the audacity of hope, and witnessed him being elected as the next President of the United States of America. Our own lives have seen the ebb and flow of fears and hopes. My own life has its fair share. Today I am not fearful, but what about tomorrow? What about this New Year – 2009?
Phillips Brooks, who was a preacher in Boston and Philadelphia, wrote the hymn O Little Town of Bethlehem in 1868. He originally wrote the hymn for the children in his church but it has found its way into hymnals and Carol Services for over one hundred years since. Brooks wrote the hymn after visiting Bethlehem and the Holy Land in 1866. For some reason, the line the hopes and fears of all the years are met in thee tonight hasn’t left me the last couple weeks. It has been a kind of Christmas theme to me and one that is very apt for this New Year.
I was driving through Edinburgh today and wondering about the hopes and fears of the people I could see wearily scurrying about. Partied-in faces, heads down in some cases, laughter. There was a building where the words do not fear were graffitied across one wall. I don’t know the sentiments that inspired that particular art work but the words reminded me of the hopes and fears that were met in that little town of Bethlehem some 2000 years ago.
Last week, I watched the film The Nativity with my family. It was my first time viewing it and what really struck me were the hopes and fears of Mary and Joseph as they heard the news of Mary’s conception with the Christ-child. What confusion and bewilderment they must have experienced, what array of emotions must have been playing on their minds and hearts. And yet, they were given the strength to believe and to act. Despite their own fears, their own lack of understanding, their families’ reactions, Mary pondered these things in her heart and Joseph married her. And they journeyed to Bethlehem. And Jesus was born.
What a definition of hope in the midst of fear! And, how we need a definition of hope. It was exciting to see the first African American man in history being elected to the US Presidency. He rode to election success on the back of promising hope for today and the future. But how defined is that hope? We shall see, and the world watches expectantly. Those involved in the Christmas story were watching the stable expectantly – Mary and Joseph, the shepherds, the angels – and, likely, later, the wise men.
Keane has an album called Hopes and Fears. I like it and, today, I looked to see if there was a song called Hopes and Fears on the album. There isn’t, incidentally. But, what struck me was how easy it is to not know for what we hope or what we fear. How do we define these things?
In the Gospel accounts, it is written that Jesus was once fast asleep on a boat in the middle of a stormy Sea of Galilee. The disciples were worried and fearful and woke Jesus up, who rebuked the wild sea and the disciples’ shaky and normal faith. Jesus defined that hope – and it was in the midst of the storm. He had full control and mastery even over the forces of nature...and the disciples’ hearts if they would but trust him.
Jesus brings that hope. Jesus is that hope, because after he had lived and breathed on this earth – doing good, teaching, healing, raising the dead, weeping and laughing, eating and sleeping – he died because of our sins and then rose from that cold grave.
That is hope in the midst of fear – earth shattering fear. The disciples and Jesus’ family did not know what to do and even went into hiding for a short time. Jesus appeared to them and said to them those words, do not fear.
Jesus speaks to us of real life and hope in the midst of despair, depression, chaos, fear and hopelessness. It’s not about gritting our teeth and bearing it – although, at times, life is gritty and messy and wearisome. But, his life, and hope, in us is about faith and trust, about light piercing the darkness and being empowered by him to face whatever comes. That’s how I want to face this New Year – looking to Jesus. He is that view point and sign post for us – giving us hope in the midst of our fear as we journey through life.
Monday, 22 December 2008
Life in Summary
Nice...5 months of silence. How can that happen? It’s not that nothing has been happening in my life or the world at large - far from it. Here are some items in summary, in no particular order:
- My second trip to Eastern Europe: youth camp in the mountains of Transylvania; travels in Maramures (northern Romania) in a hired VW Polo; encounters with local people
- A long-distance relationship with an amazing girl in New Jersey. I thought long-distance relationships were well nigh impossible but it is such an adventure. The advent of Skype was a genius idea!
- A loooong summer walk through Budapest, enjoying the architecture, the Jewish district, old book shops, parks and the River Danube.
- A short stay in Bremen, Germany
- Barack Obama was elected as President of the United States
- Seeing 2 American robins in my neighbour's garden. The last time American robins were spotted in the UK was in the 1960s!!
- Hungarian speeches at a wedding in Aberdeen
- A week long hiking trip at Cape Wrath, northwest Scotland
- Credit crunchiness
- Another rainy UK summer
Wednesday, 23 July 2008
Toyohiko Kagawa
Don’t hide
don’t run
but rather
discover in the midst of fragmentation
a new way forward:
a new kind of journey
marked by its fragility,
uncertainty
and lack of definition
And on that path
to hold those hands
that even in their brokenness
create a new tomorrow.
To dance at the margins
and to see the face of Christ
where hurt is real and pain a way of life.
To be touched
in the eye of the storm,
aware that tomorrow may not bring peace.
Impossible you say:
Let me retreat
and find rest.
What rest my friend
in these fragmented times?
Unless you lead me Lord,
the road I journey is all too hard.
Through trust in Thee alone
can I go on.
don’t run
but rather
discover in the midst of fragmentation
a new way forward:
a new kind of journey
marked by its fragility,
uncertainty
and lack of definition
And on that path
to hold those hands
that even in their brokenness
create a new tomorrow.
To dance at the margins
and to see the face of Christ
where hurt is real and pain a way of life.
To be touched
in the eye of the storm,
aware that tomorrow may not bring peace.
Impossible you say:
Let me retreat
and find rest.
What rest my friend
in these fragmented times?
Unless you lead me Lord,
the road I journey is all too hard.
Through trust in Thee alone
can I go on.
Internal Wanderings & Abundant Grace
Something that has struck me again about the character of God is His endless capacity to forgive and to share grace with sinners. The last few months I have felt so spiritually parched and barren, wandering aimlessly, and lazily, in my heart, from Him. Yet, for no merit in myself, He again offers forgiveness and abundant life in Jesus. That’s how I want to live my life – soaring like an eagle on the updrafts of God’s grace and the freedom which He offers, not bound and shackled by own limitations and weaknesses. Yet, I know that when I do stumble and fall He is there to pick me up and accept me and give me the strength to continue, in my faltering way, to follow Him.
Tuesday, 8 July 2008
Feeling avuncular
I gotta tell you, I'm enjoying being an uncle so much I can't imagine what it must be like to be a father!! My brother's wife had a baby girl at the end of February and Ella is such an amazing baby! I'm still filled with awe every time I see her and the bundle of life she is.
Genesis 3 in the Garden
My garden has been crying out for me to tend to it for too long now. This evening I ventured into it to cut the grass and “do some weeding”. I was confronted with a taste of the curse of Genesis 3:17 when God cursed the ground because of Adam and the ground produced thorns and thistles as a result.
My forearms are testifying to the thorns and thistles and I was confronted with the truth of God’s Word. It reminded me, not only, of my neglect of things horticultural but my neglect of things spiritual at times - many times. How easy it is to grow cold, lazy and negligent in my love for God and His Word.
I couldn’t believe how much effort the garden required just to look tended to again and it still requires more work! So does my walk with God and how I need the help of the Holy Spirit to walk humbly and steadfastly with Him. As I examine my life, it is full of the thorns and thistles of pride, laziness, anger...the list goes on and reflects somewhat the mess and chaos of the wider world. Right there in the garden of my own heart.
Adam wouldn’t have then known the full implications of his and Eve’s actions but even there, in the 3rd chapter of Genesis, God gave them a promise of redemption. I love how Jesus is prophesied right there in verse 15 when God was cursing the evil one for tempting Adam and Eve. Jesus would, one day, conquer him. Sin won’t reign in this world indefinitely without being checked, without being challenged, without being vanquished! And, that’s why Jesus came, to deal with these spiritual and physical weeds, thistles and thorns. I’m looking forward to the new heavens and new earth, in which righteousness will dwell forever.
My forearms are testifying to the thorns and thistles and I was confronted with the truth of God’s Word. It reminded me, not only, of my neglect of things horticultural but my neglect of things spiritual at times - many times. How easy it is to grow cold, lazy and negligent in my love for God and His Word.
I couldn’t believe how much effort the garden required just to look tended to again and it still requires more work! So does my walk with God and how I need the help of the Holy Spirit to walk humbly and steadfastly with Him. As I examine my life, it is full of the thorns and thistles of pride, laziness, anger...the list goes on and reflects somewhat the mess and chaos of the wider world. Right there in the garden of my own heart.
Adam wouldn’t have then known the full implications of his and Eve’s actions but even there, in the 3rd chapter of Genesis, God gave them a promise of redemption. I love how Jesus is prophesied right there in verse 15 when God was cursing the evil one for tempting Adam and Eve. Jesus would, one day, conquer him. Sin won’t reign in this world indefinitely without being checked, without being challenged, without being vanquished! And, that’s why Jesus came, to deal with these spiritual and physical weeds, thistles and thorns. I’m looking forward to the new heavens and new earth, in which righteousness will dwell forever.
Thursday, 3 July 2008
Wednesday, 2 July 2008
Saturday, 28 June 2008
Friday, 27 June 2008
Thursday, 26 June 2008
Jimmy the Jimny
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I crashed my car at the beginning of the month. It all happened so quickly: a combination of a wet road, a very sharp corner and rear wheel drive transmission. Before I knew it, I was skidding across the road, then hitting 2 walls before the car came to rest.
Thankfully, there were no passengers or other road users involved and I am thankful to God for safety. Accidents don't always turn out like this and I was mindful of my cousin Rob who had a bad motorcycle accident a couple weeks before me. He was in critical condition for several days before being allowed home and is still being nursed back to full strength by his family.
My Jimny was written off. It looks like superficial damage in the photo but there was so much of it the insurers figured it would be better to write the car off.
Thankfully, there were no passengers or other road users involved and I am thankful to God for safety. Accidents don't always turn out like this and I was mindful of my cousin Rob who had a bad motorcycle accident a couple weeks before me. He was in critical condition for several days before being allowed home and is still being nursed back to full strength by his family.
My Jimny was written off. It looks like superficial damage in the photo but there was so much of it the insurers figured it would be better to write the car off.
Sunday, 27 April 2008
Do you want to do life?
That was the question that Karl, my pastor, was asking tonight. We had a mind-blowing baptismal service tonight! The presence of God was so tangible in the testimonies of the 6 who were baptised. Each had a different story of the work of God in their lives but attested to the grace of God in changing them and giving them real life with Him. The presence of God was also evident in the joyful praise and preaching, from John 3:16. Sometimes we get a taste of heaven on earth and what an amazing glimour of the hope that is in Jesus Christ!! God is so good...
All present?
My small group at church started a new series on Wednesday night. It’s called NOOMA and is led by a guy called Rob Bell. The name NOOMA is an English phonetic spelling of the Greek word pneuma, which is commonly translated to “spirit” or “breath”. (see http://nooma.com/)
Here’s a little taster of one of the NOOMA studies:
Incidentally, that’s not the one my small group watched. We will soon, I hope. The film we viewed this week, entitled Today, was dealing with not living in the past or always thinking about the future, but living to the full - now, today. It was a challenge as a group to discuss what our favourite / most fulfilling time of life was and why it was. Did we hark back to a better day or time, wishing things were somehow different today? Did we think we had been dealt a bad hand? Had life given us a bum deal? Were we carrying baggage that we needed to put down? Or, were we realising what Jesus has for us in his fullness and power today? Were we living selfishly for ourselves or living with open hands, engaging with others and serving them.
Bell spoke of John 20:17 where Jesus says to Mary Magdalene, Do not hold on to me, for I have not yet returned to the Father. Go instead to my brothers and tell them, ‘I am returning to the Father, to my God and your God’. The context was after Jesus’ death and resurrection and Mary Magdalene was looking for Jesus’ body at the tomb where his body had lain. Jesus appeared to Mary and said these words to her: Do not hold on to me. Bell took this to mean that Mary wasn’t to wish that Jesus was still alive in his pre-crucifixion life, that things had somehow turned out differently, that Jesus would remain on the earth, that...Jesus had something far more amazing and profound for Mary, the disciples and his followers for all time. The Holy Spirit was being sent to comfort and indwell his people, to empower and minister the power of Jesus in this world through the lives of Christians.
That stimulated and gripped me. Although I don’t necessarily think back to a specific time that seemed better in my life, I am not always living in the light of the presence of the Holy Spirit in my life. I am not always present for those in my life. It is so easy to be full of the stresses of life or occupied with other thoughts when people need our full attention and relationship.
I was driving to Glasgow last week and was caught in a mega traffic jam on the M8. As I was starting to allow myself to get frustrated, wishing I could sail straight through and not have to negotiate the mayhem, I was reminded of the NOOMA study. I could pointlessly wish I was somewhere else or accept the circumstance and think on good things as Philippians 4:8 challenges us. This wasn’t just the power of positive thinking but actually moving beyond the circumstances and seeing and experiencing what God has for us at that time, now. What does God have for us to learn? How can we more closely relate to him and to others around us?
This morning at church another circumstance painfully brought this lesson home to me. A guy, Mike, who I had been getting to know at church over recent months died this morning. Last Sunday I sat next to him during the morning service and he requested prayer for going into hospital during the week for heart issues. I said I would pray for him. I had every intention of doing it and I like to think I said a silent prayer for him last Sunday. I don’t remember. But I didn’t diligently pray for him when he was at the hospital. Now, I’m not saying that Mike would still be alive today had I prayed for him like I wanted to. God is a sovereign God. What I am saying is that I allowed the busy-ness and circumstances of last week to cloud my vision and distract me from being present and praying for Mike.
Relationship is about getting near to someone and being there for them. Often, I am not good at relationship. OK, maybe on a superficial level, but I take a long time to really open up and get real with people and allow them to get real with me. That is possibly why I am not (yet) married. Again, God is sovereign and has his will and purposes and, yes, I am glad that I am not yet married but I have failed in relationships so far. I have been selfish and unintentionally hurtful to those who I have got somewhat close to.
I am so thankful for the grace of a wondrously tender and generous Father God. We make mistakes, we sin, we foul up again and again and again. We hurt, we forget, we fail, and yet, God is there and loves us despite...He is there for us and wants us to learn from our weakness, from these circumstances that come our way. Oh, how I want to learn from these things and be here, today, for the people I know and love...
Here’s a little taster of one of the NOOMA studies:
Many of us have experienced situations where we’ve prayed and it felt like God wasn’t listening. And yet other times we’ve prayed or known someone that prayed and the situation changed. Does God answer prayer? Sometimes, but not all the time? Or does God always answer prayer and it's just that sometimes God says no? Some of us are angry with God for not answering the prayers we’ve prayed for years. Why did he answer their prayer but not ours? What if there’s more to prayer than just God listening and answering? Maybe if we understood how Jesus prayed, our concepts and expectations of prayer would change.
Incidentally, that’s not the one my small group watched. We will soon, I hope. The film we viewed this week, entitled Today, was dealing with not living in the past or always thinking about the future, but living to the full - now, today. It was a challenge as a group to discuss what our favourite / most fulfilling time of life was and why it was. Did we hark back to a better day or time, wishing things were somehow different today? Did we think we had been dealt a bad hand? Had life given us a bum deal? Were we carrying baggage that we needed to put down? Or, were we realising what Jesus has for us in his fullness and power today? Were we living selfishly for ourselves or living with open hands, engaging with others and serving them.
Bell spoke of John 20:17 where Jesus says to Mary Magdalene, Do not hold on to me, for I have not yet returned to the Father. Go instead to my brothers and tell them, ‘I am returning to the Father, to my God and your God’. The context was after Jesus’ death and resurrection and Mary Magdalene was looking for Jesus’ body at the tomb where his body had lain. Jesus appeared to Mary and said these words to her: Do not hold on to me. Bell took this to mean that Mary wasn’t to wish that Jesus was still alive in his pre-crucifixion life, that things had somehow turned out differently, that Jesus would remain on the earth, that...Jesus had something far more amazing and profound for Mary, the disciples and his followers for all time. The Holy Spirit was being sent to comfort and indwell his people, to empower and minister the power of Jesus in this world through the lives of Christians.
That stimulated and gripped me. Although I don’t necessarily think back to a specific time that seemed better in my life, I am not always living in the light of the presence of the Holy Spirit in my life. I am not always present for those in my life. It is so easy to be full of the stresses of life or occupied with other thoughts when people need our full attention and relationship.
I was driving to Glasgow last week and was caught in a mega traffic jam on the M8. As I was starting to allow myself to get frustrated, wishing I could sail straight through and not have to negotiate the mayhem, I was reminded of the NOOMA study. I could pointlessly wish I was somewhere else or accept the circumstance and think on good things as Philippians 4:8 challenges us. This wasn’t just the power of positive thinking but actually moving beyond the circumstances and seeing and experiencing what God has for us at that time, now. What does God have for us to learn? How can we more closely relate to him and to others around us?
This morning at church another circumstance painfully brought this lesson home to me. A guy, Mike, who I had been getting to know at church over recent months died this morning. Last Sunday I sat next to him during the morning service and he requested prayer for going into hospital during the week for heart issues. I said I would pray for him. I had every intention of doing it and I like to think I said a silent prayer for him last Sunday. I don’t remember. But I didn’t diligently pray for him when he was at the hospital. Now, I’m not saying that Mike would still be alive today had I prayed for him like I wanted to. God is a sovereign God. What I am saying is that I allowed the busy-ness and circumstances of last week to cloud my vision and distract me from being present and praying for Mike.
Relationship is about getting near to someone and being there for them. Often, I am not good at relationship. OK, maybe on a superficial level, but I take a long time to really open up and get real with people and allow them to get real with me. That is possibly why I am not (yet) married. Again, God is sovereign and has his will and purposes and, yes, I am glad that I am not yet married but I have failed in relationships so far. I have been selfish and unintentionally hurtful to those who I have got somewhat close to.
I am so thankful for the grace of a wondrously tender and generous Father God. We make mistakes, we sin, we foul up again and again and again. We hurt, we forget, we fail, and yet, God is there and loves us despite...He is there for us and wants us to learn from our weakness, from these circumstances that come our way. Oh, how I want to learn from these things and be here, today, for the people I know and love...
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